Wednesday, June 16, 2010
- Wednesday, June 16, 2010
' No point crying buckets of tears when he doesnt even knows it ' - Alysha.
that should be me, feeeling your kiss, making you laugh.
Yeah, true true. No point, but, i just missed our old times, my mat blondie, my mat shades, my laughing partner, my matrep, used to be my everything. The time that you left is veh un-expecting. All my sweetdreams turns to nightmares. I tried to find a replacement for you. But its just so fvcking hard. Everytime i try to be strong, i just fall back to pieces. Still, you're the best i ever came across. Now, sitting down, holding back my tears. Trying to be someone which is not me. I just hate it. I thought being with someone else can make me forget bout the pain in my heart. But, i know it was not working. I tried opening my heartt to someone else, like how you did, but, i cant. I CAN'T. )':
You did many sacrifices for me. You didnt went to work cos i was sick, you texted sister to remind her to get me to eat medicine when i was sick. You told her to takecare of me. You worked extra hard to buy prepaid, so that you can contact me. You shocked me by buying me the huge teddy bear which i still tug in to sleeep. You gave me so much memories, taught me how to be independent, stay strong. Teach me how to be mature, youre my motivation to study hard. You told me, if i reached 'N' level, you'll come back. )': , I hope you will. I promised myself, to study hard, and try to win your heart back. But, all hopes are just hopes. How can i possibly get you back, you've moved on. Maybe somehow forgotten bout me. But how could i forget you. And all our memories. I tried, slowly, but everything just comes back to me. All the memories. They say ' Comparisons are easily done when you've had the taste of perfection'. Argh, i missed us. I hope one day, you'll come back to me. *cross fringers, prays*
"Let go of him, if he comes back to you, He's yours to keep."
And, i would like to thank my babygirl, for being there for me when i was somehow lost&confused. Haish, babe you know how hard i want him back right. Words cant simply explain my broken heart. Gah, english pecaaaaaaaaaaaaah~. I wished i got the same strength as hers, she managed to get haiqal back to her. While i cant simply get akyf back to me. I want him back, like badly. He's the only one that truly understands and love me. Its so hard to let him go. You know, i am lying if i say, i moved on and i dont want him back. It hurts me so bad when zai left me in year 2009, and it hurts me worser when akyf left me without a explanation. I guess i wasnt good enough for him afterall. But, I dont know why. My heart still cries for him. I still cry hys name when i go to sleep. I just want him back. If i would choose amongst all my ex's, i'll choose him. He's the only one that makes me happy everyday, makes me wanna wake up everyday. )': , Without him, i feeeel so incomplete. I guess i'll end here.
Labels: does she loves you the way i did
